Happy Mother’s Day, Boss Mummas

Nanma & Nate – Wimbledon UK

My Mumma is a Boss-Mumma.

She raised two extremely different daughters, in two extremely different generations, solo, for two extremely different reasons.

I’ll give you some background:

My sister and I have an 11 year age gap.

Our Mother raised my sister as a single mother, during a time when it was almost unheard of, really.

It’s hard to comprehend just how recently unwed mothers were shipped off to convents under a veil of secrecy, to have their precious babies taken away from them and re-homed with ‘more suitable’ parents, but it happened, and it happened incredibly close to when my Mother had my sister. It even happened to another beautiful mumma in my family.

Thankfully, Mum was able to keep my sister. She juggled work and parenthood alone, right up until she met my father. They married, and had me.

I was born with a heart condition, and sadly, my father passed away in a car accident before it was operated on.

Mum now had two daughters, one facing open heart surgery, and was about to go through single-parenthood all over again.

She did it, and she did it well.

I have no idea how, but she held down a stable, full-time job. She provided us with everything we asked for. She took us on holidays, she spent time with us, she made us feel secure and loved. I’m sure I had questions as a small child, but overall I only considered my childhood to be a normal, happy one.

That’s a huge testament to how much hard work she put in to motherhood.

I genuinely believe that if my Mother had $10 left to her name, and she even thought for a second that my sister and I were struggling, she would give us $4 each and leave herself with $2. Then she would feel guilty about it, and try to give us every last cent.

Parenthood is not easy. Ever. You could have all the money, all the resources, all the patience and love; but it is still not going to be easy.

So, in honour of my Boss-Mumma, I wanted to do a shout out to all of the Boss-Mummas out there this Mother’s Day.

Firstly to all of you single-mummas; smashing all the stereotypes, facing all the judgement, tackling all of the dramas and trying to desperately fill all of the roles: You are amazing, be proud.

To all of you mummas to be; dealing with your own hormones, your body’s changes, your fears and doubts, while also dealing with literally EVERYONE having an opinion on what you can and can’t eat and drink, what you should or shouldn’t do/buy/think.. even how you should sleep: You are amazing, it will all work out, you will work it out.

To all of you new-mummas; never sleeping, hardly eating, adjusting to the sudden influx of experts on your own life and your own journey, trying to remember your own name and keep your family afloat, all while trying to work out who you just became: You are amazing, and I promise you’ve got this.

To all of you working-mummas; tackling drop-offs and pick-ups, switching between a work-brain and a home-brain, facing your own set of judgement and your own sense of guilt: You are amazing, a solid role-model, and the appreciation will come.

To all of you studying-mummas; getting up early and staying up late, working your butt off to try and better yourself and your prospects, justifying your choices and looking to the future, while, yet again, facing all the judgement: You are amazing, you are strong enough and smart enough to do this; it will all be worth it.

To all of you stay-at-home mummas; keeping your family together, keeping them all clean, fed, warm, happy, holding everything down, and yep, facing all that judgement too: You are amazing, you are valuable, you are irreplaceable.

To all of you young-mummas; finishing off school/college/still deciding what direction you want to take your life in, starting from scratch and watching your peers live a totally different life: You keep focusing on you. Honestly, I don’t think we ever have our sh!t together, we are all just working it out as it comes: You are amazing, you can handle this.

To all of you older-mummas; trying to find a group of your peers to relate to, wading through an abundance of advice from friends who have lived it all already, still juggling the judgement and the self-doubt: You are amazing, you deserve to enjoy this, and you are allowed to still be learning.

To all of you step-mummas; embracing, raising and loving those children as though you made them yourselves: You are amazing. Blended families aren’t easy to keep harmonious, but what an accomplishment when it works.

To all of you mothers in-law; accepting, welcoming and loving the person your baby has decided to make family. You are amazing, well done for handing over the mantle, for expanding your hearts and your lives to these ‘chosen ones’.

To all of you Grand-mummas; trying to help, trying to love and parent your babies with babies of their own: You are amazing, and loving grandparents are a valuable luxury.

To all of you adoptive and foster-mummas; opening your hearts and your homes to children that need it the most: You are amazing, inspiring, and I am totally in awe of you.

To all of you dad-mummas and mumma-daddies; you guys holding a family together without the societally accepted and generally expected female or male counterpart, whether you are a same sex couple or one parent flying solo: You are amazing, you are tearing up an outdated rulebook, and you are important.

To all of you mummas of babies no longer with us; whether those around you know about your loss or not; it counts. You deserve to be thought of, considered, and loved. Mother’s day can be so, so hard, and for those who suffered a loss, particularly one that was not openly known, it can be a day of solitude, reflection and grief. You are amazing, and you are not alone.

To all of you with mummas no longer with us; my love and heart goes out to you.

Happy Mother’s day. ♥

©CatOwens2017

P.s. below are some of my favourite mumma pics, of the boss mammas in my life, and in the lives of my loved ones. Share and tag your mumma! I’d love to see yours?